You don’t want to feel hurt, angry, sad, afraid, or more. But you don’t know how to transform your emotions. Let your imagination and LDT™ be your guide.
“Atticus said that Jem was trying hard to forget something, but what he was really doing was storing it away for a while, until enough time passed. Then he would be able to think about it and sort things out. When he was able to think about it, Jem would be himself again.” [emphasis added]
"Storing It Away": You Have A Healthier Option
While not being able to think about a stress or conflict for a while can be a very healthy behaviour, “trying hard to forget” or “storing it away” is not.
In the summary article on LDT™, you learned that if you paint a different picture – that is, transform your metaphor or scene – you transform your emotions at the same time. But what do you paint with: your intellect; your intuition; or your spirit?
Having explored the Locate and Describe steps of LDT™, it is time to look at Transform.
Transform: Intellectual, Intuitive, and Spiritual
Locate, Describe, & Transform (LDT™) is both practical and grounded in research. And while I recommend connected intuition when working with your metaphors, you will succeed whether you think your way through, trust your intuition, or connect to a spiritual or religious source.
Transform includes both transformation of the metaphor in order to create a more positive story, and the transformational power offered from connection to your personal belief system.
Thought
- You could take a thought-based approach
- having meticulously laid out your scene in Describe, you might transform your metaphor piece-by-piece
Sometimes, when I really can’t settle myself, I think my way through a transformation, step-by-step.
Intuition
But imagery and metaphor represent your emotions, and are usually intuitive: You don’t choose the pictures you see or the language you use.
- More often than not, your intuition will serve you better as you transform your original image or metaphor
- ask yourself for a replacement phrase, image, or part of your scene, and trust what comes to you
Intuition is my go-to approach for transforming metaphors quickly and effectively. I want my emotions out of the way as fast as possible so I can get on with my day.
Connection
Particularly when it comes to healing from larger stresses or conflicts, you could go a step further.
- If you choose to connect with whatever spiritual, religious, or energetic source you believe in, you will feel yourself guided
- you will know when to think and when to intuit
- the transformations will come to you with more ease
- you will feel supported rather than isolated with your emotions
When my head is buzzing, my emotions are taking over, or the situation is more serious, I go the extra step. Taking whatever time I need, I connect to my version of source energy and relax into a place of mindfulness.
Once I let go, I feel guided through the transformation process. I have connected for as little as five seconds, and as long as ninety minutes.
It All Requires Imagination
The power of metaphor and embodied emotions, for both good and bad, lies in your body’s inability to tell the difference between an imaginary scene and a remembered event.
- Emotions are reactions in your body
- If you imagine or remember something positive, your embodied emotions will turn positive
- If you imagine or remember something negative, your body’s reactions – your emotions – will be negative
As Dr. Antonio Damasio states:
Emotions are not logical. Your metaphors and imagery have little, if anything, to do with facts. So even if you think your way through your transformations, you must be willing to let your imagination come up with replacements in your scene. Realism will limit you. If you aim for it, at best you will be slowed down. Most likely, you won’t transform your emotions at all.
Give It A Try: From Jagged Edges To Gentle Footprints
In the previous article, when the focus was on Describe, you were left with this negative image of walking on jagged pieces of glass:
Take a moment now to imagine the details of your own scene for the walking on glass metaphor.
With your scene in mind:
- Locate the reaction(s) in your body.
- Describe your scene in detail.
- Transform it into something more soothing.
As you do, you also transform your body’s responses, and thus your emotions. And from this grounded place, you can make your healthiest decision about your next best step.
This bare foot walking on sand offers one transformation. As long as you imagine the sand to be cool and soothing, you can start to feel your toes stretch out, your face relax, and your body calm.
In this instance, glass grinds down to sand, so the transformed metaphor has the same root. But this is not necessary. If you go with the flow rather than try to think your way through, you might find your relief comes from a scene or phrase completely unrelated to a bare foot stepping on anything, and includes many wonderful sounds, smells, tastes, or textures.
Powerless? Maybe. But Transform Your Emotions, And You Will Know YOUR Next Best Step
In Harper Lee’s To Kill A Mockingbird, Atticus, the lawyer dad, did his best to defend an innocent Black man from charges of rape and assault of a nineteen-year-old white woman: The rape had never happened, and the beating had been given to her by her father.
The case was so clear-cut that Atticus’s ten-year-old son, Jem, well-versed in courtroom testimony and fact-finding, did not think – he knew – that Tom Robinson would be found not guilty.
'He's just gone over the evidence,' Jem whispered, 'and we're gonna win, Scout. I don't see how we can't.'"
Atticus had always known better:
The real victory was in the hours, not minutes, it took the all-white, male jury for the guilty verdict. Disheartened but prepared, Atticus knew his next step: Appeal. But shocked and facing the loss of his innocence, Jem did not bounce back so quickly.
'Is he all right?' Aunty asked, indicating Jem.
'He'll be so presently,' said Atticus. 'It was a little too strong for him...'
'Atticus-' said Jem bleakly.
He turned in the doorway. 'What, son?'
'How could they do it, how could they?'"
Jem had no control over his world. He could not end racism; he could not force the men on the jury to act truthfully. LDT™ would not have changed any of that.
But LDT™ can give you the power to transform your emotions, and help you to make your own healthy decisions going forward.
And when one person stops reacting from emotions, it opens the doorway for others to follow:
'Who?' Jem was astonished.
Atticus's eyes twinkled. 'It's not for me to say, but I'll tell you this much. He was one of your Old Sarum friends...'"
Not long before the trial, a mob had gone to the jail to lynch Tom Robinson. Atticus had been sitting calmly outside the jail door, but his eyes had shown his fear. Suddenly, eight-year-old Scout (Jean Louise), her brother Jem, and their friend, Dill, had pushed through the crowd.
Through friendly persistence, Scout had made a positive connection with a family member of a would-be juror. And that family member caused the juror to change his mind, at least until the others wore him down.
'Hey, Mr. Cunningham.'
The man did not hear me, it seemed...
'Don't you remember me, Mr. Cunningham? I'm Jean Louise Finch...'
'I go to school with Walter,' I began again. 'He's your boy, ain't he? Ain't he, sir?'
Mr Cunningham was moved to a faint nod...
I slowly awoke to the fact that I was addressing the entire aggregation. The men were all looking at me, some had their mouths half-open...
I looked around and up at Mr. Cunningham, whose face was equally impassive. Then he did a peculiar thing. He squatted down and took me by both shoulders.
'I'll tell him you said hey, little lady,' he said.
Then he straightened up and waved a big paw. 'Let's clear out,' he called. 'Let's get going, boys.'"
Transform Your Emotions And Start Changing The Conversations
Working with your embodied emotions and metaphor can help you to put your best foot forward in any scenario. This does not mean your footsteps will always be calm and planned; sometimes the only way forward is to shake things up. But if you do so from a place of positive action instead of negative reaction, you are well on your way to changing the conversations.
